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Love in the Time of Crap Filmmaking

November 2nd 2008 11:19
I know you did one of the Harry Potter's, Mike Newell. I'm pretty sure you did a good job, too. But you've made a complete and utter mess of Love in the Time of Cholera. Utter pants it is.

Rule No. 1: If you're going to make a movie that should rightfully be made in a language other than English, let the actors speak with English or American accents and viewers can suspend their disbelief and pretend it's that other language. Do not -- do not -- make them speak in English with an accent. It sounds crap and hammy. The result is a film that seems like a parody in every moment except for when Javier Bardem is onscreen.


Rule No. 2: Hire make-up artists who can actually create decent ageing looks for the actors.

Rule No. 3: Do not hire John Leguizamo. It just won't work after he played the little guy in Moulin Rouge.

I'm sure there are other things I could point out, but the most important thing to note here is that Love in the Time of Cholera is a horrible movie and it is funny when it's meant to be serious.
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